choking with anger
Posted 08-17-2011 at 07:41 AM by Hana Ogi
I am so angry I am choked with it. My niece has had many problems over the last few years stemming from a bad relationship with her step-father. Daily psychological abuse coupled with some- a few- physical incidents lead me to think there have been more…
My sister, her mother, has permitted this to go on, despite her protestations that she would never allow this type of psychological abuse to happen to her daughter.
Ultimately, my sister concluded that it would be in my nieces best interest to live with me during her last year of high school.
My niece contacted me and asked if I could get her a plane ticket to move here from FL (to TX). I spoke with my sister for over an hour to confirm that she was in agreement. I bought the kid a plane ticket.
Five days before the kid was to get on a plane, my sister decided that she should "put her foot down" and forbid this.
It is rather ridiculous as the kid is 17, and will be 18 on 21 September, when she will be able to do as she wishes regardless.
After so many years of being a lackadaisical, rather ineffectual parent, why she would chose this point to assert herself is incomprehensible, other than that her husband, the kid's step-father, is a controlling schmuck.
I find it unbelievable that my sister is so dilatory and pusillanimous. And she informed the kid that running away from problems won't solve them… this after spending 6 weeks in my house to avoid a visit from Child Protective Services after the kids high school Social officer discovered the kid is a cutter.
Even our mother, an abusive narcissist if ever there was one, never, ever told either of us we could take such an action and then reversed herself.
I am literally choking with anger.
My sister, her mother, has permitted this to go on, despite her protestations that she would never allow this type of psychological abuse to happen to her daughter.
Ultimately, my sister concluded that it would be in my nieces best interest to live with me during her last year of high school.
My niece contacted me and asked if I could get her a plane ticket to move here from FL (to TX). I spoke with my sister for over an hour to confirm that she was in agreement. I bought the kid a plane ticket.
Five days before the kid was to get on a plane, my sister decided that she should "put her foot down" and forbid this.
It is rather ridiculous as the kid is 17, and will be 18 on 21 September, when she will be able to do as she wishes regardless.
After so many years of being a lackadaisical, rather ineffectual parent, why she would chose this point to assert herself is incomprehensible, other than that her husband, the kid's step-father, is a controlling schmuck.
I find it unbelievable that my sister is so dilatory and pusillanimous. And she informed the kid that running away from problems won't solve them… this after spending 6 weeks in my house to avoid a visit from Child Protective Services after the kids high school Social officer discovered the kid is a cutter.
Even our mother, an abusive narcissist if ever there was one, never, ever told either of us we could take such an action and then reversed herself.
I am literally choking with anger.
Total Comments 8
Comments
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:O unbelievable!Posted 08-17-2011 at 09:02 AM by fireflame2009
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i hope all works out for you and your family
the best thing i can say coming form slimier situations is that you have to be there for the kid mind and body try your best to help her out anyway you can right now it seem that one thing to do is really talk to her because she must feel like no one is listening to what she has to say and that they don't care about it but talk really helps some times i wish you the best of luck with this problemPosted 08-17-2011 at 11:12 AM by tonysshadow -
If she is 18 next month can you post pone the ticket I would tell her on her bday to jump a plane and take off.Posted 08-17-2011 at 11:40 AM by narusasu1 -
Agreed, truly unbelievable.Quote:Originally Posted by fireflame2009
:O unbelievable!Posted 08-17-2011 at 01:10 PM by Sissy -
STUPID!!
... for the million time.. CALL THE FREAKIN POLICE!!
.. anything happens to that girl then you're as responsible as the people who made you "choke with anger" 
Posted 08-17-2011 at 01:18 PM by MKHsma - Victims of abuse cases are often in denail about their situation. Such people usually have a higher tolerance of abuse, and may even accept it as normality or are in denail and believe that it isn't as bad. This is how one ends up stuck with an abusive counterpart way past the expiration date of the relationship.
Try to get your niece out of there please.Posted 08-17-2011 at 01:32 PM by Pandemonium phaze
Updated 08-17-2011 at 01:40 PM by Pandemonium phaze -
yep, and thanks for your support
believe me, I know and have experience with these issues… so, in some kind of order;
yes, her ticket is date changeable for a small fee
since I can offer no evidence, the police are unable to participate- I know this because my uncle, who lives 2 hrs away, is a retired cop, and my cousin is a detective in the same jurisdiction. So, while there is nothing that can be legally done at this point, there are observers so to speak.
Since it is only 5 weeks to her 18th birthday, child protective services would essentially take no action. It's a crappy situation no matter what.
This is a kid who plans to be a math major with a double minor in physics and programming or astro-physics. also, the best I can do for her…
The only action I can take is to be encouraging and supportive, and present.
And to send cash. And try not to asphyxiate myself on anger. Stay cool I guess.
Of course, there is a Sicilian proverb that translates loosely as "Revenge is a dish best eaten cold." Karma is a *****.
Thanks for your support folks. AC is about the only place I can post where my family or social circle won't think to look, and it's an invaluable benefit to me, as is your support.Posted 08-17-2011 at 09:42 PM by Hana Ogi -
am gonna turn you to an apple tree
Posted 08-18-2011 at 09:28 AM by MKHsma
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