Need opinions on this sonnet
Posted 04-21-2009 at 11:18 AM by Leiv
Less We Forget the Sun
I gaze up into the whirl-wind beauty of the night;
the shadowy wraiths of clouds blending shades of black,
the glistening stars of this cold night twinkle back,
to my eyes, who wonder and dazzle in their delight.
Though the stars were bequest of glistening light
and this wondrous night has all the elegance of an aristocrat,
the comfort of the sun was missing and so on the grass I sat
With this mysterious soothing night filling me with fright.
As the night prolonged I wished for the suns gentle blaze,
Its warmth and encouragement I missed and yearned,
as I had forgotten the suns glory and thus the dawn did it amaze.
As the dawn?s horizon filled with colors so alive they burned
I no longer had to fear the dark while bathed in the suns soft rays
And so less not forget the glory of the sun, for darkness to light it turned.
I gaze up into the whirl-wind beauty of the night;
the shadowy wraiths of clouds blending shades of black,
the glistening stars of this cold night twinkle back,
to my eyes, who wonder and dazzle in their delight.
Though the stars were bequest of glistening light
and this wondrous night has all the elegance of an aristocrat,
the comfort of the sun was missing and so on the grass I sat
With this mysterious soothing night filling me with fright.
As the night prolonged I wished for the suns gentle blaze,
Its warmth and encouragement I missed and yearned,
as I had forgotten the suns glory and thus the dawn did it amaze.
As the dawn?s horizon filled with colors so alive they burned
I no longer had to fear the dark while bathed in the suns soft rays
And so less not forget the glory of the sun, for darkness to light it turned.
Total Comments 5
Comments
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did you write it?...i wouldn't be surprised
Posted 04-21-2009 at 06:11 PM by Mazza
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Not really an opinionPosted 04-21-2009 at 06:49 PM by Leiv
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alright alright
i obviously can't give you a very professional one though
it like it coz it reminds me of when i go out sailing meaning i do catch a good few sunrises, and i get that feeling of apprieciating the fact that its getting lighter every minute because it's not nice being in the pitch dark at night when your sailing, it's quite scary not seeing where you are going.
haha i hope i got the meaning of it that's what i was thinking off when i read it lol random i knowPosted 04-21-2009 at 07:54 PM by Mazza
Updated 04-21-2009 at 07:59 PM by Mazza -
I liked it, it reminds me of something i wrote for a poetry contest... It was about the sun at dawn...Posted 04-21-2009 at 09:00 PM by MaximRide
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Well i see that you finally posted your poem. Its really good you know. I hope to see more like it*take care my friendPosted 06-03-2009 at 02:38 AM by MelindaY
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