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question for married couples/long-term relationships..

Posted 07-10-2012 at 12:41 PM by neutral12
Updated 07-10-2012 at 12:44 PM by neutral12

I know its not any of my business but >.> my curiousty refuses to be deterred...
Anyway, this question is specifically aimed at couples/partnerships - those who have lived together...

I've always wondered...
when you're with your significant other, is it what you pictured it would be? or different?
Like living with them... being with them...

Sorry if this is wierd....and please don't comment that it was a waste of time -
JUST DONT READ MY BLOG ENTRIES :x sheesh...

but to those who do answer, thanks alot :3

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well you don't expect things to go your way all the time :x

*nuff said

Posted 07-10-2012 at 12:53 PM by Kaprichosa
I get mad when they steal the duvet :U

Posted 07-10-2012 at 01:03 PM by Freya

well that depends on what you expect, I like my marriage but if you think you are gonna have that weak in the knees and butterflies after a period of time then you fantasize too much.
This is why there should be more then just attraction, because you will become comfortable and you need to have common interests and be able to be friends as well as lovers (and be able to communicate freely), that way all aspects of the relationship stay alive

Posted 07-10-2012 at 01:10 PM by narusasu1 narusasu1 is offline

What Naru said...!

Also,

Spoiler

You both change individually, so your relationship changes. When you start out you have no idea what lies ahead.
Where you end up is often nothing like you pictured.

(frequent question for me & DH: "Did you ever imagine that one day we'd be doing [whatever it is, usually involving kids LOL] ?" )

Circumstances such as your jobs, having kids, moving to new place, financial situation, proximity to parents/family, your health and physical abilities & appearance... those all change the things you have to deal with.
"For richer/For poorer; In sickness & in health" is no joke!

*HOW* you deal with those things is important. Do you start from the beginning trying to be both honest and considerate/loving? Do you compromise or at least take turns? Do you shout insults or manipulate to get your own way? (Your spiritual beliefs do make a difference in how you both interact, but all I'll say here is, make sure you talk about that honestly, and be honest with yourself what you are willing to compromise on and what is a deal-breaker)

*Do you try to see beyond your own point of view?*

Are you honest about your own faults, do you try to take responsibility for your own issues/mistakes? Sometimes you're disappointed in the person you love - can you acknowledge that they may find reason to be disappointed in you? Can you / do you apologize, as well as forgive?

Over time, I've discovered faults in myself that seriously need improving. You constantly have to work at your love and keep trying to make good decisions and learn new things.

I realize that sometimes the changes/problems are too much for the relationship to survive. For me, however, the relationship is richer, deeper, better. We've been through some stuff - but nothing like the loss of a home, or of freedom, or of a child (God forbid!) or immediate family member. We know there are still challenges ahead. Neither of us is the young energetic idealist we once were, but we've been there for each other and trust each other more.
Unexpectedly, some "other things" can apparently improve over time, too.

Personally, I wouldn't trade this time for those beginning days, as exciting as they were.

Hope that helps answer your question and isn't too 'preachy'.

Posted 07-10-2012 at 04:12 PM by ZonieCatz ZonieCatz is offline

	Well He is perfect... In every way possible... thus far my expectations were exdeed by significant amount and my expectattions were high... He so hawt o yee
	Posted 07-10-2012 at 06:59 PM by Pexster

	I'm going to keep it simple since your question was also simple. Honestly, I could never have imagined this. I lay in bed each night and watch/listen to my husband and I truly, from the bottom of my soul, thank God for giving me this man.
	Posted 07-11-2012 at 07:47 AM by matinthehat77

XD Thank you for answering everyone! :3 You guys are awesome~

Posted 07-11-2012 at 09:12 AM by neutral12

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	well you don't expect things to go your way all the time :x *nuff said
	Posted 07-10-2012 at 12:53 PM by Kaprichosa

	I get mad when they steal the duvet :U
	Posted 07-10-2012 at 01:03 PM by Freya

	XD Thank you for answering everyone! :3 You guys are awesome~
	Posted 07-11-2012 at 09:12 AM by neutral12

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