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| View Poll Results: Do you like this? | |||
| Yes! |
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7 | 53.85% |
| A little. |
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4 | 30.77% |
| Not really. |
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1 | 7.69% |
| No. |
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1 | 7.69% |
| Voters: 13. You may not vote on this poll | |||
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02-03-2008, 10:34 PM
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#1 (permalink) |
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Limping Samurai
Lvl.5
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Searching for the remaining two members of Twilight, my group. Our goal is to destroy the Twilight.
Posts: 275
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Twilight
From the dude who brought you "Bleach: Tales of the Shinigami", here's Twilight!
Before you read the chapter, read this top part, because there are a few things I'd like to clear up. 1.) If you see someone's name and you see one of these---------> : followed by text, it means that that is what the character is saying. 2.) If you see someone's name and you see one of these---------> ( followed text and then one of these---------> ) it means that is what the character is thinking. 3.) If you see someone's name and you see one of these---------> * followed by text and then another one of these---------> * it means that is an action a character is doing. 4.) In Japan, a person's LAST name is said FIRST. Example: Uzumaki Naruto One more thing: If you read "Tales of the Shinigami", then you'll know that the names of the characters in "Tales of the Shinigami" are the same as the names in "Twilight". That is because I made up Twilight FIRST. Okay, that should be it. Enjoy. ^^ I know it's not much, but what can you expect from the first chapter of something? Twilight: Chapter 1-The Savior Female's voice: The world as we know it is gone. An evil and horrifying black shroud called the Twilight covers Earth's natural sky. It spawns bloodthirsy monsters called Raiken that feast on humans, and it is slowly draining the planet of its life. There is no hope for us. At this rate, the Earth will die in a few years. We need a miracle. No, not a miracle....But a savior. Little Girl: HELP! HELP ME!!! Raiken: Heh heh heh, there's no one who CAN help you, brat! You're as good as dead! Little Girl: HELP!!! Raiken: *Swings claw at girl* *Cut appears on girl's forehead* Little Girl: *Whimpers* Raiken: It's time to DIIIIIIE!!!! *Swings claw at girl again* Little Girl: AAAAAHHHH!!!! *Girl closes her eyes* *Clang!* Little Girl: Huh? *Opens her eyes* Boy: You should get outta here, kid. Little Girl: Who....Are you...? Raiken: You're GONNA be DEAD!!!! *Swings his other claw at the boy* *Clang!* Raiken: (Who the hell IS this guy anyway? He's blocked BOTH of my claws!) Boy: Well? Are you gonna get outta here or not? I'm not gonna stand here all day. Little Girl: ... Raiken: Grrrrr! You damn brat, take THIS! *Raiken kicks at boy* Boy: *Jumps up and lands on the leg* Raiken: Why you... Boy: Look kid, if you're not gonna get outta here, at least back up a bit. Little Girl: *Backs up* Boy: That's better. Raiken: You bastard! You aren't even paying attention to me! Boy: *Turns around to face the Raiken* Alright you, it's time to die! Raiken: You cocky little- Boy: *Puts other hand on sword* Raiken: ! Boy: I won't show any mercy to those that try to kill children. Raiken: WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, HUH?! Ichimori: Ken Ichimori. Nice to meetcha. *Slices Raiken's head off* Little Girl: You...Killed him.... Ichimori: *Yawns* Little Girl: How can anybody be so calm just SEEING a Raiken? Ichimori: Look, I don't see what the big deal is. I kill 'em all the time. Little Girl: Incredible...You must be 14 at most... Ichimori: 15, actually. Am I THAT short? Little Girl: No, I- Ichimori: It's fine, you didn't mean to call me short. Little Girl: Did you say you kill them all the time? Ichimori: Yeah. I've devoted myself to saving the world from the Twilight, which partly means saving people from Raiken. Little Girl: Hey...Can you eat at my house for dinner? Ichimori: Sure. Little Girl: Great! Come with me! Female's voice: At last, the Savior has shown his face....As he struggles to accomplish his goal, we must place our face in this boy... TO BE CONTINUED |
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02-04-2008, 01:12 AM
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#3 (permalink) |
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Limping Samurai
Lvl.5
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Searching for the remaining two members of Twilight, my group. Our goal is to destroy the Twilight.
Posts: 275
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Re: Twilight
Cool.
Oh and for future reference, Twilight is NOT set in the present day. The people live in villages mostly. The only cities that exist I made up. |
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02-05-2008, 12:22 AM
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#5 (permalink) |
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Limping Samurai
Lvl.5
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Searching for the remaining two members of Twilight, my group. Our goal is to destroy the Twilight.
Posts: 275
|
Re: Twilight
Sweet, we're onto a good start.
Here's Chapter 2. Twilight-Chapter 2: All Is Not Well Little Girl: I'm home, Yin-chan! Teenage Girl: Karin! Where have you BEEN?! I thought the Raiken had got you! Karin: One almost DID! But Ichi-kun saved me! Yin: Who's that? Karin: Ichi-kun! Where are you? I wanna introduce you to my big sister! Ichimori: Hey. Yin: Karin, can I talk to you for a second? Karin: Sure, Yin-chan! Yin: *Whispering* How could you let a stranger into our house?! He's got a sword, Karin! A SWORD! Karin: But he saved me from the Raiken! Yin: *Whispering* Shhh! Quiet down, he might hear you. Karin: *Whispering* He's the one, Yin-chan! He says he kills Raiken all the time! Yin: WHAT?! Ichimori: ? Yin: Oh, I just, uhhhh... Ichimori: You're talking about me. Yin: (How did he know...?) N-No, of course not! Ichimori: I don't really care... Yin: Oh...W-Well, we were sorta.... Karin: We were talking about how you're the one! Ichimori: The one? Karin: To save us! Ichimori: Oh. Yeah. I guess I am... *Footsteps coming down the stairs* Old Lady: Is that you, Karin? Thank goodness you're finally come home. But who's that with you? Karin: Hi, Grandma! This is Ichi-kun! He's the one to save us! Old Lady: Heh heh, of course he is, Karin. Karin: I'm SERIOUS! Yin: She's right, Grandma. He saved Karin from the Raiken. We owe him big. Ichimori: *Yawns* Old Lady: He's just a boy, though. He must be your age, Yin. Karin: He's 15. Old Lady: So he IS as old as Yin. Ichimori: Look, you don't have to believe them. Now, can I have some food? Old Lady: And he's RUDE, too. Ichimori: Well the kid invited me here for some food, so if if you're not gonna give me any then I'll be leaving. Karin: Wait, Ichi-kun! Grandma did't mean it! You can stay here! Ichimori: ......No, I can't....*Walks out door* Karin: I don't get it....I don't think he has any other place to go.... Yin: Just leave it, Karin. Karin: But... Yin: Don't worry about it, Karin. He seems like a happy guy....Kinda.... Old Lady: No... Yin: ? Old Lady: He's hurting inside.... Yin: How can you tell? Old Lady: I can just tell. It's in those icy blue eyes of his. Yin: I don't think sooooo. Karin: I think we should go after him. Yin: Why? He's a bum. Just looks at that blonde hair. It's all spiky and uncombed. Karin: A minute ago you agreed he'd save us from the Twilight! Now you're calling him a bum? Yin: *Sigh* Forget him, Karin. If he's really the Savior we'll see him again eventually. Karin: Okay... *Meanwhile* Ichimori: One more second with those people, and I think I would've died... Raiken: That can be arranged. Ichimori: You guys just don't learn... Raiken: Ya know, that annoying thing you do when you don't even look at someone when you're talking...It really pisses us off! Ichimori: *Unsheathes sword* Like I care what pisses you off? Raiken: Heh...You should! *Six other Raiken appear* Ichimori: Ooooh, scaaaary. You're gonna gang up on me cuz you suck by yourself. Raiken: You brat! I'm gonna wipe that smirk off your face! Ichimori: Heh...I'd like to see you TRY. Raiken: RAAAAAAHHHH!!!! *Charges at Ichimori* Ichimori: Way too slow. *Appears behind Raiken* Raiken: !!! Ichimori: *Stabs Raiken* Raiken: AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! *Disappears* Ichimori: Who's next? Raiken: YOU BASTARD!!! WE'LL TEAR YOU TO SHREDS!!! *They all charge at him* Ichimori: Idiots...*Jumps up* Raiken: ?! Ichimori: Die. *Slices downwards and takes out three of them* Three left. C'mon. Raiken: RRRRRRRR!!! WHY ARE YOU SO DAMN STRONG?!?! Ichimori: Nine years ago, when I was only six, I saw my brother die in front of me. Raiken: ? Ichimori: My goal is to find and kill the one who took him from me. I could care less about this planet. Raiken: Then why do you kill us?! Ichimori: Because of you, families are torn apart. I won't forgive you. Raiken: Ha! You talk big, but- Ichimori: *Chops Raiken's head off* Two to go. Raiken: Let's beat it! *The two Raiken start running* Ichimori: Oh no you don't! *Holds sword high* See you in the next dimension. *Swings down, and a black crescent shoots out* Raiken: WH-WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?! *Crescent hits the Raiken* AAAAAAAHHHHH!!!! Ichimori: One to go. Raiken: AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! DON'T KILL MEEEEEEE!!!!! *Sprints* HAVE MERCY!!!!! Ichimori: Was that Raiken gonna show mercy on Karin? WAS HE?! Raiken: I-I-I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!!!! Ichimori: Like I give a damn. *Shoots another crescent* Raiken: AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!! Ichimori: *Sheathes sword* Burn in hell... Female's voice: A vengeance which burns deep within him, his true goal is revealed. Denying his true destiny, who will save the world now? TO BE CONTINUED |
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02-05-2008, 11:07 PM
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#7 (permalink) |
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Limping Samurai
Lvl.5
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Searching for the remaining two members of Twilight, my group. Our goal is to destroy the Twilight.
Posts: 275
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Re: Twilight
I read and commented on it. ^^
Here's Chapter 3. Twilight-Chapter 3: The Promise...! Karin: Ichi-kuuuuun! *Runs through the field to him* Ichimori: (God damn it....) Karin-chan, nice to see you again. Karin: Please come back, Ichi-kun! You're the Savior, and we need you! Ichimori: Really? I didn't get the message from your Grandma. Karin: Well you shouldn't have asked for food like that! Ichimori: You promised me food, that's why I came. Karin: What do you mean? Ichimori: *Sigh* Look, you think I'm the "Savior", right? Karin: Yeah! I mean, who else? Nobody even knows how to fight Raiken, except you, Ichi-kun! Ichimori: You're wrong. Karin: Huh? Ichimori: There are many people who are strong enough to fight the Raiken. Karin: W...What are you...? Ichimori: The problem is obvious. Humans are just humans. They don't even carry weapons. Karin: But YOU'RE a human. Ichimori: ... Karin: Why aren't you saying anything? Aren't you human? Ichimori: ....Of course I am. But if I'M a human, and I can kill the Raiken, then any human can. Karin: No, you're wrong! *Tears form in her eyes* Ichimori: I'm not the Savior, Karin. I'm just a kid who's been through a lot... Karin: So Grandma was right...Under that cocky and bored exterior, you're hurting inside... Ichimori: Aw, what does that old hag know? Yin: A lot, thanks very much. Ichimori: Great, so you're here too...Look, I can do whatever the hell I want, who are YOU to tell me what to do? Karin: ... Ichimori: If I don't want to save the frickin' world, I won't. I don't believe in destiny. Karin: No...Don't say that... Ichimori: Yeah, keep dreaming, kid. This world's screwed, 'far as I'm concerned. *Starts to walk away* Karin: No, Ichi-kun, come back! You have to save the-AAAAAHHHH!!!! *A Raiken appears and grabs her* Ichimori: KARIN!!! Karin: *Muffled voice* Ichi-kun! Help! Ichimori: DAMN YOU!!! *Unsheathes sword* Raiken: Heh. Ken Ichimori, the guy who acts so tough, has a soft spot for little kids, huh? Ichimori: PUT HER DOWN!!! NOW!!! Raiken: And what if I DON'T?! Ichimori: I'LL KILL YOU. Yin: (I've never SEEN him like this...He's usually so care-free...) Raiken: Heh...I think you've got it all wrong... *Thirty Raiken surround Ichimori, Yin, and the leader Raiken* Raiken: ...It's YOU who will be killed. Ichimori: THIS again, huh...? Raiken: Ya see, I've heard you ain't completely human... Karin: !!! Ichimori: Tch! Raiken: From what I'VE heard, when you get angry, you become stronger... Ichimori: Don't test me. Raiken: Oh, that's what I FULLY INTEND to do. I wanna see you at your STRONGEST. *Pulls out sword* Ichimori: What are you...? Raiken: You seem to be protective of this human girl... Ichimori: NO!!! Yin: DON'T!!! Ichimori: *Drops to his knees* Please...I'll do anything... Raiken: As tempting as that SOUNDS...*Brings sword closer to girl* Ichimori: STOP!!! Raiken: You should've seen this coming...You've killed our kind for FAR TOO LONG. Ichimori: I SAID STOP!!! Karin: *Muffled scream* Raiken: DIE!!! *Stabs Karin* Yin: NOOOOOO!!!!! Ichimori: RrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! *Eyes turn black* Yin: What's....Happening...?! Ichimori: I SWEAR....I'M GONNA TEAR YOU APART. *Hair tuns black and grows to his waist* Raiken: I see...So THIS is your power... Ichimori: I WON'T FORGIVE YOU...*Sword turns extremely jagged, an evil aura surrounds him* Raiken: !!! NO...YOU CAN'T BE...!!! Ichimori: You'll never tear apart a family...EVER AGAIN!!! Raiken: K-KILL HIM!!! NOW!!! All the Raiken: RAAAAAAHHHH!!!! *They all charge* Ichimori: *Jumps up, shoots a black crescent* *All thirty Raiken die* Ichimori: Now it's just you... Raiken: Grrrrrr.... Ichimori: You took her life away...I'll take YOURS. Raiken: *Drops Karin* COME ON THEN!!! I'LL BE THE RAIKEN TO KILL YOU!!! Ichimori: *Raises palm* No...You won't be killing anyone else...*A black ball forms in his hand* Raiken: There's no doubt about it..."HE" has been sealed inside another body...And that's YOU. Ichimori: As you die, consider this...Why did I think I EVER had a chance against Ken Ichimori? Raiken: If I had known...That "HE" lived inside of you... Ichimori: Excuses... Raiken: You'll never defeat the Twilight...YOU HEAR ME?! YOU'LL NEVER DEFEAT THE TWILIGHT, UKAZI!!! Ichimori: *Runs up and forces black orb into the Raiken's chest* Yeah, I hear ya... Raiken: Good...*Cough* Ichimori: Leave this world. Raiken: Heh...*Disappears* Ichimori: *Hair, eyes, and sword return to normal* KARIN-CHAN!!! *Runs over to her* Karin: Ichi....Kun.... Ichimori: Don't speak, Karin. We can still save you... Karin: No...I have to...Ask you something... Ichimori: ...What is it? Karin: Promise me...You'll be...The Savior... Yin: ... Ichimori: ...I swear. I couldn't save you, Karin...But it's not too late for everyone else... Karin: That's all...I needed to hear...*Turns her head to Yin* I love you, Onee-chan... Yin: I love you too, Karin. Karin: Tell Grandma what happened...Tell her that Ichi-kun promised...To save us... Yin: I will...*Tears run down her cheeks* Karin: Don't be sad...I'll always be with you... Yin: *Nods and wipes away tears* Karin: *Closes eyes* Ichimori: *Stands up* I can't stay with you... Yin: I know...But I'm worried about you. Ichimori: Heh heh heh...Don't worry about ME, I'm the strongest dude in the whole universe! Yin: Yeah... Ichimori: Besides, I'm not alone. Yin: ? Ichimori: After my brother was killed before my eyes, I met Kaiten, a kid just like me...We've been best friends ever since. Yin: But where IS he? Ichimori: Heh...God knows... Yin: He's your best friend and you don't know where he is? Ichimori: He's unpredictable. He wanders off a lot. No worries, I'll find him. *Starts to walk away* Yin: Goodbye, Ken Ichimori-kun! Our Savior! Promise me you'll visit again sometime? Ichimori: *Smiles* I swear. Female's voice: He swears to save the world, while seeking revenge. As our hero leaves Yin, she can't help but realize that she still knows almost nothing about him... TO BE CONTINUED
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[Only registered and activated users can see links. ] [Only registered and activated users can see links. ]  [Only registered and activated users can see links. ] Last edited by Light; 02-06-2008 at 12:59 AM.. |
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02-06-2008, 01:51 AM
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#10 (permalink) |
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Limping Samurai
Lvl.5
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: in a place where the nearest anime convention is 300 miles away
Posts: 394
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Re: Twilight
why did karin have to die?!
 she was so cute! *sniff* well now i wanna know what ichi will do next and more about his power so i guess ill have to read more
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) keep posting the good stuff
